Good Time Guarantee – Pineapple & Pearls
“THIS IS A PARTY!”
And if that wasn’t clear from the disco ball, the sparklers, or the sequined handcuffs featured on the Pineapple and Pearls website, it is made explicit when the restaurant reaches out to confirm your RSV
Because my birthday is right in the middle of Christmas and New Year’s, I’ve never had a birthday party. So, this was perfect: Pineapple and Pearls would be hosting my first birthday party ever, thanks to the generosity of a very special person. Because apparently this special person feels like I am a very special person and he sent me a gift card to celebrate my 30th birthday at Pineapple & Pearls with dinner for two.
Helpful note: thankfully, Pineapple and Pearls gift cards do not expire! I’m often late to parties; for this one, I was nearly 1.5 years delayed. (That has to be a world record for latest late arrival to your own party!)
The Overview
- Pineapple and Pearls pineappleandpearls.com
- Barracks Row; Washington, D.C.
- Hours: Wednesday – Saturday 5:00pm – 10:00pm
- Price: $$$$/$$$$$ [Pretty Expensive]
- Reservation Difficulty: Easy, Breezy!
- Dress Code: Apparently, none. But chic night out attire is encouraged
- Scene: All the coolest, best dressed people in D.C. gathered in one space to celebrate!
- Perfect For: Any special occasion – even if you have to make one up!
Pineapple and Pearls was my last D.C. Michelin restaurant to visit. That is partly because it was closed for the longest after the pandemic. Michelin was gracious enough to allow Pineapple & Pearls to remain listed as a 2 star restaurant in its 2021 dining guide – in spite of the fact that Pineapple and Pearls remained closed for service until May 2022. I was vocal on my instagram about feeling that this was pretty unfair, since other restaurants had already reopened and had worked painstakingly hard to remain worthy of critical acclaim during one of the most challenging times in restaurant industry history.
The other reason for my delayed visit was a bit of controversy. “The industry lost an entire generation of its workforce,” Aaron Silverman said in a November 2021 interview with The Washington Post. But Silverman also lost a few more of his staff for reasons beyond the pandemic: allegations of a toxic, sometimes abusive work environment in his restaurants were made public in fall 2020. To his credit, Silverman’s response to the accusations and ownership of the culture problem within his company read (to me) as authentically apologetic and remorseful. Still, I haven’t been back to Rose’s Luxury since those allegations were made. Coincidentally, one of the employees who came forward with grievances was the person who had been my waiter on multiple visits to the restaurant and, thus, largely responsible for my stellar experiences there.
While the quality of food at Rose’s Luxury and Little Pearl have always been exceptional, I have my (other) favorites. And since neither Rose’s Luxury nor Little Pearl are among those favorites, I will admit that I was a bit skeptical of whether or not Pineapple & Pearls would prove to be worthy of its 2 stars. But there was a lot of reason to believe in its potential.
Aaron Silverman has been piled high with accolades since the debut of Rose’s Luxury, his first restaurant, in 2013. A Maryland native, Silverman’s career in the restaurant industry began in 2003 under the mentorship of Jonathan Krinn, a family friend who was then serving as the chef at 2941 in Falls Church, VA. Krinn offered a sort of blueprint for his apprentice to follow, and Silverman executed it with precision – committing to 10 years of experiential learning in restaurant kitchens in Virginia, New York, and South Carolina before moving back to D.C. to open his own. Upon his return, Silverman opened several award winning restaurants in quick succession. Just three years after Rose’s Luxury (2013) came Pineapple & Pearls (2016), and then Little Pearl in 2017.
Echoing sentiments he shared in his 2015 Ted Talk, Pineapple & Pearls promises that it is “no longer a traditional fine dining restaurant… You just happen to get an amazing meal while you’re here”
Indeed, the traditional model is eschewed from the very start. This is an experience formatted like Coachella… but for food. Paparazzi included! Before the food fun begins, the host took a polaroid picture of Marissa Beckham and I. It’s better this is done before the revelry, with lipstick still intact and perfectly applied blush – and no alcohol flush!
After taking our seats, the staff brought over two large books. These gastronomic tomes contain photographs and stories related to Rose’s Restaurant Group, a place to leave an autograph, and the menu.
As any good party host would allow, guests are able to choose their own adventure. Each of the four courses has at least two options to choose from, though you are warned to be prepared for surprises in between.
The parade begins almost immediately. We shared our first “cheers!” with an absinthe apertif cocktail called “Death in the Afternoon”. If absinthe is the beginning of a meal, you should know a good time is coming – this is a liquor with a reputation.
The amuse bouche that followed has something of a reputation, too: two crepes fashioned into “beggars purses”, filled with caviar and creme fraiche. The staff dared us to enjoy them sans hands; the purses, set atop glass pedestals, are at the perfect height to be savored in such fashion. I have no doubt this is how they were originally enjoyed at the Quilted Giraffe in New York City, the source of inspiration for this dish. The restaurant – a favorite among A-listers, media titans, business tycoons, and royals from the Middle East until its closure in 1992 – often sold trays full of them, priced at $50 for each piece.
The opening chess move: a checkerboard of raw tuna and watermelon settled in a dashi broth. This course combines a delicate umami flavor with mild, sweet citrus.
The alternative first course option is a lamb you’re sure to like, Even If You Don’t Like Lamb, since it is plated with a crumbly chocolate cake topped with cherries. And what if you happen to enjoy lamb? Well, then, you’ll actually love this dish! I found the chocolate cake to be a peculiar pairing… until I realized that it is perfect for soaking up the gorgeous lamb jus.
It seems that Aaron Silverman is one with tremendous respect for his elders, as our next course included a nod to another chef. While working together at (now closed) Insieme in New York City, Marco Canora passed his secret family recipe for gnocchi along to Silverman. The gnocchi is famously light with a recipe that is deceptively simple: only potato and flour. You need nothing else… but technique, of course! Luckily, Pineapple & Pearls has mastered it.
Just as delicate, and served to the table as a concurrent course, was the bacalao ravioli. This plate surprised me because the bacalao (dried and salted cod) fritter reminded me of Spanish “buñuelos” or Caribbean “stamp and go”. But the sauce is decidedly French! It makes for a gorgeous and delicious fusion of cuisines.
The main act for our dinner was the Wagyu, world class not only in its tenderness but also in its accompaniments: a topping of guanciale infused sauce and crispy southern collard greens, with hearts of palm and guava served alongside it. You’re also provisioned with crispy cornbread takoyaki. There is enough to enjoy individually and to use in sopping up any remaining sauce from your plate.
This was a journey around the world – from the U.S. to Brazil and Italy, all the way to Japan – in about 90 seconds for me, because that’s how long it took to finish the plate. Incredibly delicious!
After the main event, a tray of “show stopper” jello shots were brought out on a scene-stealing mirrored plate.
Nothing about these will make you nostalgic for the jello shots made in the teeny kitchen of a college dorm room, using powdered strawberry jell-o mix and a value liter of McCormick vodka poured into plastic shot cups. (Please excuse the walk down memory lane..)
Instead, you’ll appreciate the good life you’re living now. This life has you enjoying premium champagne, absinthe, and gin, skillfully and artfully combined into wiggly chromatic cubes of gelatin. Not jell-o. Gelatin!
These were followed by an unconventional cheese course – white strawberries from Japan stuffed with La Tur cheese. La Tur is a decadent, creamy Italian cheese made with sheep’s, cow’s, and goat’s milk.
The hands making these must be surgically precise, because the strawberries themselves appear perfectly intact and unmanipulated. The delicate strawberry flavor and smooth tang of the cheese made for a perfect palate cleanser.
Following a fairly serious service mishap, our hosts sent out a generous procession of desserts and aperitifs.
As a fan of breakfast for dinner, I think my favorite of them all was the funfetti birthday short stack. It’s edible from flame to flapjack! The edible wick gives you just enough time to make pictures, video, and a very belated birthday wish as it melts the butter.
A chromatic collage of sorbets made for a great refreshing interlude – with flavors that were more tart than sweet – as we set to work on our menu desserts.
The Thrilla in Manila features coconut, use, and lime but was, disappointingly, more thrilling in name than execution. On the other hand, the Dulce de Lethe Brûlée donut with pear sorbet was a flavor and texture delight.
Marissa and I shared an espresso martini toast to end dinner, courtesy of a generous gentleman from my Onlyfans. It seemed like an elegant enough nightcap, but Pineapple and Pearls had something even more debonair in mind: an amaretto pour in a brandy snifter, lightly warmed by a tealight. It’s presented with a swirl of buttered popcorn soft serve that was so sensationally delicious that I asked for an extra cup to take home!
I rarely want photographic evidence of any night that consists of so much wine and revelry, but our parting gifts consisted of our pre-party Polaroid and… a few more (there may be a photo somewhere of Marissa striking a pose on top of the bar… may be… )
Long ago, I learned the trick for heading off a hangover: extra strength Tylenol, with plenty of water, before bed. But Pineapple and Pearls has an even better solution to help you recover from an indulgent night- a wagyu cheeseburger as a midnight snack.
R&B poets Jagged Edge posed the question of the century in 2001: “Where’s the party at?”
Well, consider the case closed: on any given night in D.C., the party you want to be at is being hosted at Pineapple & Pearls. Even with the fête faux pas, the service was strong and the food was impeccable.
